hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
