Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
