she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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