I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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