idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
two words: eviction party
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
