If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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