My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
