he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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