If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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