You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
