i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Well I just put wine in my tea
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
