i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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