yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
