I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
