Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize