There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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