The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i think i have herpe
just one?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
