Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
