she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize