i barfeds in our rink
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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