I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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