the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
