so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
