i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
do herpes really smell.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
