Tell her she can't have a vagina
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
