My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
