i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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