We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
