I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
