She's JV to your varsity
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
