What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
