Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
