Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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