see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
