dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
3pm strippers are depressing
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
