I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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