you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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