I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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