just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
