don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
