I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
