Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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