weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize