I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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