They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
