Ambien. No doubt about it.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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