i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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