wat bout pragnant strippers??
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
she looked like the before picture.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
