it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
