have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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